Sunday, September 30, 2007

The week we met Xio (she was small but still cute)...

I wanted to show you a few pictures of our trip to Amor Del Nino in June of this year. Mitzi and Shane (our dear friends that have started a ministry to the orphans of Guat called Abba's Children) and Chris and I began dreaming about taking a group of people to Amor Del Nino. God completely put the team together. Most of us did not know each other, but by the end of the trip....they felt like family. We were the first "official" team to stay in the mission house (an amazing place for the teams to stay)....and we spent the week serving Steve and Shyrel and playing with the kiddos whenever we got the time. One of the cutest moms ever, Suzanne, came up to me on day two of the trip. She said, "I think I found your baby (in the greatest Southern accent)!" Suzanne had spent the day at casa #1 while I was working on landscaping at casa #2 (kind of funny....I actually jumped on the trampoline with the kids most of the time). So, I walked into casa #1 and Corinne and Suzanne immediately took me to precious Xiomara. WOW! My heart was so overwhelmed....and so confused. I had studied every child's face on the web-site before leaving for that I would know them all by name. She was not on there. Come to find out, Xio had been brought to the orphanage the week before. To make a long story short, God continued to grow our love for this little baby. Chris spent the little bit of time he had with her....singing a song he made for her. He said it was the first time in his life he saw a child that he could not stop looking at.

So, the day we left in June was heart-wrenching!! We kissed her and prayed with her....and told Steve and Shyrel that we would be praying about possibly adopting her. Well, that's all it took. We are in love with her!! There are a lot of obstacles ahead of us. #1 She has to be considered legally abandoned. #2 The courts need to give full custody of her to Steve and Shyrel. #3 Somehow, pray that the Lord will provide a way for us to complete this adoption in the midst of the chaos going on in Guat.

We love you all!! Thanks for posting comments.....we love the encouragement!!! It is so fun to hear from people that we have never met before.

Love, Lindsey

P.S. My incredible, beautiful mom (Kay) is the one holding Xio on the last picture!! What an amazing thing to have my mom there to share this with us!!!!! Thank you Lord.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Our Only Hope

I keep reading Psalm 146 over and over.
It is deeply comforting to me to read verse 5
"Blessed is he whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in the LORD his God,"

It then goes on to declare that it is The LORD who:
sets prisoners free,
opens the eyes of the blind,
lifts up those who are bowed down,
loves the righteous,
watches over the sojourner,
upholds the widow and the fatherless, and
ruins the way of the wicked.

He does all this...not me. He may use us, but it's not up to us to make it happen...He does it.
There is great relief in that for me.

Hope in Jesus alone is all we've ever had, but lately I'm much more aware of it.
I need you Jesus,
You alone are our Only Hope



I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living!
Wait for the Lord;
be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the Lord!

Ps. 27:13-14

P.S. I think she is going to be a piano player (that will make my grandmother happy)!

Friday, September 28, 2007

I'm having a sad morning.....

This is definitely a post I have not wanted to even think about or write....but my heart is literally aching right now. I really feel like I could throw up. Wow....doesn't that sound like a girl trusting in the Lord?! As of yesterday or two days ago, the government issued a very clear warning to anyone planning to adopt from Guatemala or anyone that is even in the process. Please read the web-site below.....because I know my words are not adequate.

What does this mean? Only the Lord knows. This all seems kind of crazy and surreal right now....I feel a little bit numb. The last three years have been the hardest of my life (definitely another story)....I have begged the Lord for answers and for change, and the answers from the Lord have not always been what I have asked for. I am realizing that my idea of redemption doesn't always look like the Lord's. But even with many unanswered questions, Jesus has ushered me out of a deep hopelessness and depression.....into light and LIFE that I have never experienced before!

So, here I am again. The Lord is asking, "do you trust Me?" The fleshy part of me is screaming I'm scared. I want to bring baby Xio home. Chris and I were dreaming last night of her running through our bedroom doors and jumping into our bed. This is completely out of our control. Selfishly, I don't now want to enter another season of waiting and pain.....but I am willing to do it for Xiomara. Please, please be praying for Chris and me. Pray for strength, for peace, and for wisdom. We are in desperate need of encouragement right now.

Hoping and Trusting, Lindsey

Thursday, September 27, 2007

My Best Friend...

My husband is my hero.
He serves so sacrificially...
He loves unconditionally...
He's not afraid to take risks...
He's just as obsessed with Guatemala...
He loves Jesus more than anything...
He prays with me every night...
He leads our family with such strength...
He is humble, yet courageous...
He's my best friend!

I love you, Lindsey

Wednesday, September 26, 2007 not be anxious about anything?

Our church is studying the book of Philippians together. The series is entitled "The Journey Toward Uncommon Joy." In chapter 4 Paul exhorts us to Rejoice in the Lord not be anxious but rather to pray and allow God's peace to guard our hearts and minds. That is exactly what I needed to hear today.

I continually find myself very anxious through this whole process. The what-ifs can drive you mad. (When filling out legal documents every detail must be perfect) Brennan Manning wrote "To live without risk is to risk not living." We're definitely living with risk these days. More and more I'm seeing that as The Life of Faith- risk, stepping out not knowing, moving forward in spite of fear and unanswered questions. Just pulling the trigger and holding your breath.

In it all, it's easy to get caught up in the press of getting things done and not take time to Rejoice. I Rejoice today for the amazing wife God has given me, for our home, our little dog Polly, my job and for the privilege of knowing and fighting for Xiomara.


One down...a thousand to go!

I just sent the I-600A off this morning to the Memphis, TN immigration office (a small weight has been lifted)!! I feel like I am slowly beginning to learn the lingo. This has all felt like a foreign language to Chris and me. But, we are beginning to really see what needs to be done. With the help of Amelia and Melissa (thank you, thank you, thank you), I am not becoming super overwhelmed. I am just trying to do one thing at a time and not look too far in the future!

Now, here is the hard part. We are moving forward (because of unrest in the country of Guatemala and their adoption system) without even knowing if precious Xio is going to be deemed adoptable. I know there are a thousand things I could be worrying about....such as money to pay for this (thank you Lord for Chris's speaking engagements for the last two weekends that have paid for the home study!!)....or is the paperwork going to work out. But, all I can think about is wanting her to be named Xiomara Wheeler. I don't care if Chris and I have to become experts at e-bay and sell everything we have. I don't care if we get her as a baby (even though I would love that)......I just want her to be our first child. That is the prayer I pray so many times during the day.

Sending the application has made it seem so real. The timing is crazy....and people probably think we are. But, we are taking the risk....we have jumped.

Love you all, Lindsey

Monday, September 24, 2007

Now these are two beautiful girls!

Are you serious? Could they be any cuter?

To Xio...


I am praying for you little one. I miss you more every day....if that is possible! Know that we are begging God to take care of hold you when we can't be there. I never knew I could feel this way about any child. I want to be a mom because of you. I love you with all of my heart!


Man I Miss Her...

I think about Xiomara literally all day long. I wonder what she's doing and how she's eating. Whether she's in a swing or a bouncy seat or on the play mats right now. Each night we pray that she has a good night's sleep with good dreams. We pray that angels watch over her crib at night. Mostly we pray that God does whatever it takes to allow us to adopt this precious baby girl.

It's so wild to have someone you love so much be so far away and so out of your control or ability to affect. It very much feels like we are holding our breath, and have been for months now. Holding your breath for a long time is draining. I do know this, there will never be a celebration in the history of man to rival the celebration we will throw the day we find out that she is deemed "adoptable." Yes, we will throw an epic hoopla for the ages!

Please pray with me today. Pray that God protects this little warrior. Pray that God allows her to be my daughter, our baby girl. Pray Pray Pray and when you finish Pray a bit more!


Sunday, September 23, 2007

Check Out Her Pigtails

Here We Go...

Who is this King of glory? The LORD, strong and mighty, the LORD, mighty in battle!

Psalm 24:8