Monday, November 8, 2010

Another hard night...

To say we feel under attack tonight is an understatement! I just ran downstairs to write this blog because we are so desperate for prayers. I have had a rough day, Chris is beyond exhausted in every way, and Eliana is feeling ALL of this. Lord, have mercy! I feel so much guilt right now. I feel like such a failure as a mom and as a wife. She has been screaming bloody murder for over 2 hours. I have rocked her...I have sung every song I know...we have prayed over her...Chris is now trying to calm her little body down. She is beside herself. I know she's exhausted. I know she's tired of being passed around. I know she doesn't understand why I'm in bed and sick. Lord, how much longer?? I hate watching her hurt. She throws herself on the floor in hysterics and really seems like she's trying to hurt herself. I love her so much. Chris loves her so much. She is hurting! Please pray. Please pray for Chris. Please pray for me and my body. I just can't take much more.

Love y'all,

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Keep praying...

The last few weeks have been so difficult in so many ways. The pain has grown more intense (especially at night) heart has been fluttering pretty much all day long. I'm not going to lie; it has been pretty scary. Most nights I end up in tears begging God for mercy. Two nights ago, I had a pretty terrible episode. Chris was across the street with our neighbors...and I called him to come home. I thought for sure I was headed to the ER. Every part of me was skin was crawling and the pain was so crazy! Chris asked our neighbors to come pray over me. It was such a sweet time...and after the time of prayer my body began to settle down. Why do I doubt God? I know that He is my Healer. I think I am just so overwhelmed. I am tired of having to tell Eliana goodbye every morning. I am tired of laying in bed. I am tired of my feet & legs hurting so much that I don't want to walk. But, I am really trying to hang on and trust that He is in control. Please keep praying for me. Pray for Chris...he has SO MUCH on his shoulders right now. Pray for provision for all of our medical bills!! Pray that the Lord would give me perspective in this season.


Psalm 142

You Are My Refuge

With my voice I cry out to the Lord;
with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord.
I pour out my complaint before him;
I tell my trouble before him.

When my spirit faints within me,
you know my way!
In the path where I walk
they have hidden a trap for me.
Look to the right and see:
there is none who takes notice of me;
no refuge remains to me;
no one cares for my soul.

I cry to you, O Lord;
I say, “You are my refuge,
my portion in the land of the living.”
Attend to my cry,
for I am brought very low!
Deliver me from my persecutors,
for they are too strong for me!
Bring me out of prison,
that I may give thanks to your name!
The righteous will surround me,
for you will deal bountifully with me.